Upright, Direct Suction

You may ask yourself – in case of widespread disaster, how will you know where neighborhood healthcare providers live?

Image by david ॐ via Flickr

If these types of thoughts are keeping you awake at night, read the Doc Gurley post on Do It Yourself Sleep here’s your answer: check mailboxes for boulders of junkmail.

I’ve done all the things you can do – put my name on Do Not Sell lists, contacted marketing boards to ask them to stop, sent back fliers refusing acceptance. The problem is that the AMA keeps selling my info. Probably also the medical licensing board. And maybe even my mother. Let’s be real, it’s a pretty easy way to make a quick buck in an alley, usually without the DEA getting involved (unless, that is, the DEA is also selling me…).

Because of tough economic times, I’ve stopped renting the forklift to bring my mail into the house. However we reached a new low in direct marketing when I received a letter yesterday informing me (in earnestly deadpan prose), that, as a healthcare professional, I now “qualified” for an Upright, Direct Suction offer.

One time offer only. Act now, or miss out on your chance for an Upright Suction.*

Yes, that is what it said.

Have a misfired spam story you’d like to share? Or a story about people too lost in their jargon to hear what it sounds like? Post it in the comments section!

*A home vacuum cleaner, that is. From Oreck.

Comments are closed.